Psychology
A Plea
Today I write with a plea. Don’t quit. I’m watching so many people around me turn to stone. They quit. They quit trying, chasing, wanting. They quit caring. Life has, understandably, taken them down. Life will always do its best to erode your soul and often it succeeds. I worry about people like us who (…)
Meaningful Texts: Uses of The Erotic by Audre Lorde
It is possible that all the answers to life’s questions are in one book: The Selected Works of Audre Lorde . If you’re unfamiliar with Lorde’s work, strap in because no one is more deliberate with words, discerning with ideas, and more cutthroat when it comes to truth-telling than Lorde. To read her is to see (…)
Meaningful Text Series: The Choice by Dr. Edith Eva Eger
Good morning, I’m starting a new series called Meaningful Texts. It’s where I share an excerpt from a book that I found meaningful, in hopes that it inspires you to feel a little less alone. I hope you learn something, I hope you feel something, and I hope you see a part of yourself (or someone (…)
Psychological Honesty: The Road To Self-Actualization
“But what do you WANT to write about?” I asked him again. He couldn’t answer. He said he wanted to write a book. But he was lying. Every answer was a well-thought-out formula. An idea that could be. A template. An approach. He was a strong writer in that he was great with words. He (…)
Good Guys and Bad Guys
There are no good guys and bad guys. We’ll start with the punchline. I’ve tried really hard to divide the world into them. It would be easier if people were all good or all bad. EVIL VS VIRTUE. CRUEL VS KIND. LOVE VS HATE. JUSTICE VS INJUSTICE. None of these dichotomies are real. Often cruelty comes from (…)
Can We Make Meaningful Converstion The Norm?
How was vacation? How was the movie? How is the new place? How was dinner? How was the date? How’s work? How’d it go? We don’t give real answers to these questions. We give dismissals: “It was fine. It was great. Oh, we had a blast!” “It was interesting, different, very unique.” The question I (…)
Why is This Fun? And Other Important Life Questions You Should Ask Yourself Regularly
There’s a cowboy culture in Texas that consists of games where you prove your worth through machismo. They call this a “rodeo,” but really it is men competing with men for who is dumber. They prove dominance over animals and battle for “strength” with games like “how long can you stay on top of a (…)
Clear is Kind: Why You Should Endure The Discomfort of Being Direct
There is no such thing as a friendly reminder. “Friendly reminders” are passive-aggressive roundabout ways of avoiding direct communication and clarifying your position. There are fascinating reasons why we do this, which Dr. Harriett Lerner, Patron Saint Of All Things Anger, talks about in detail here. The gist is that many of us avoid conflict (…)